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While working at Starbucks (or other cafes) has been done before, it is usually how they meet, and the concept of this was refreshing and different. You have a nice style of writing. While it is clearly third-person, it focuses mainly on Dan, which is different from most third-person writing, which allows you to see into both perspectives. You word things quite beautifully, like "...Who was pleasantly surprised with his cheeks painted pink." While the idea of an unexpected kiss has been used many times before, you put a spin on it and kept things unexpected and moving. Really good story!
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